When I was 14 the doctors put me on the pill. My period pain was so horrendous – that was presumed to be the balm. It was not. Because what followed was the most miserable eight months where I walked down the school corridors trying to manage teenage life while coping with a range of vile side effects. From bulging eyes to headaches to spotty skin – I was a joy.
I had terrible endometriosis. Like you, I did not know for years that was the problem, or that most women did not suffer such pain. Menopause was a joy in comparison. Of course, I could not say much as obviously most people were suffering, but it was so easy for me. I hope you have the same experience.
I'm from Manchester too , have really bad period pains and found out when Ttc that I have a cyst on my overy my husband and I have been trying for 4 years now and have 2 failed cycles one IVF and one ICSI last one on March I went to work everyday while doing injections and not sure how I did it tbh. We are upset that they have not work and feel people that know don't understand how it feels to do treatment and have fertility problems we have a male factor problem.
This resonates with me so much. I am not myself and have not been myself for most of the last two years. I didn’t realise this until I had a two month break from treatment at the start of this year and realised that I had found myself again, I remembered who I am. And I’m actually pretty fun. So despite the bitter disappointment and grieving between cycles, the one silver lining I cling to are those rest bites where I get to be myself again.
My daughter is 14 - tried 3 different pills since 12&1/2. 4th attempt at trying different combination hasn’t worked. Under pelvic pain clinic their answer with no diagnosis is medical menopause !!!!! I honestly don’t know what to research, where to go to get help!! Banging my head against a brick wall. She hasn ‘t managed school in 8 months poor kid is screaming in pain she has no life and her life is being sucked away.
So glad you are talking about this Emma. I wish ‘fertile’ people had even an inkling of just how horrendous IVF drugs can make you feel both whilst going through treatment and for a good while after a cycle while all the drugs leave your system and you try to get back to some semblance of normality. The impact it’s had not only on how I feel mentally & physically but also on my ability to ‘show up’ at work and in life generally is mad. I feel like the 4 years I’ve been putting myself through all of this are wasted years where I’ve had to step back from my work (mainly) just to cope with it all. On the other hand, I’ve also learnt so much about my body, what it needs and how to listen to it telling me when I need to slow down. Currently preparing for cycle no 8 and can’t help but feel this may be our last shot, not sure how much more my body can physically take! I also worry more and more about the long term effects of all these high dose hormones.
I remember it so well, I can’t go back to it and try for another, i felt as though I’d lost myself and can’t face that again. As well as all of life losing its shine, I would often feel like I’d been smacked round the back of the head, especially after trigger shots, they then made me a wreck when I needed to be my calmest. Thank you for writing this, so many people think that doing the jabs is the hardest part, but so much sits behind it xx
Thanks for writing. Like you, currently in between IVF cycles, trying desperately to give my little IVF boy a sibling…. Decided to take the summer off , so we can actually go on holiday without me worrying every second, about picking up a bag, playing with my boy or drinking coffee…. So we’re in a little oasis of ‘not trying’ for at least 2-3 months. It’s sad - I’d much rather reach my 40th birthday pregnant, which now wont happen - but there’s a silver lining and a bit of freedom and relief…. Thank you for opening up the conversation in this way, it’s long overdue 🙏
I had terrible endometriosis. Like you, I did not know for years that was the problem, or that most women did not suffer such pain. Menopause was a joy in comparison. Of course, I could not say much as obviously most people were suffering, but it was so easy for me. I hope you have the same experience.
I'm from Manchester too , have really bad period pains and found out when Ttc that I have a cyst on my overy my husband and I have been trying for 4 years now and have 2 failed cycles one IVF and one ICSI last one on March I went to work everyday while doing injections and not sure how I did it tbh. We are upset that they have not work and feel people that know don't understand how it feels to do treatment and have fertility problems we have a male factor problem.
Wow, that ‘favourite food’ analogy is exactly it…
This resonates with me so much. I am not myself and have not been myself for most of the last two years. I didn’t realise this until I had a two month break from treatment at the start of this year and realised that I had found myself again, I remembered who I am. And I’m actually pretty fun. So despite the bitter disappointment and grieving between cycles, the one silver lining I cling to are those rest bites where I get to be myself again.
My daughter is 14 - tried 3 different pills since 12&1/2. 4th attempt at trying different combination hasn’t worked. Under pelvic pain clinic their answer with no diagnosis is medical menopause !!!!! I honestly don’t know what to research, where to go to get help!! Banging my head against a brick wall. She hasn ‘t managed school in 8 months poor kid is screaming in pain she has no life and her life is being sucked away.
So glad you are talking about this Emma. I wish ‘fertile’ people had even an inkling of just how horrendous IVF drugs can make you feel both whilst going through treatment and for a good while after a cycle while all the drugs leave your system and you try to get back to some semblance of normality. The impact it’s had not only on how I feel mentally & physically but also on my ability to ‘show up’ at work and in life generally is mad. I feel like the 4 years I’ve been putting myself through all of this are wasted years where I’ve had to step back from my work (mainly) just to cope with it all. On the other hand, I’ve also learnt so much about my body, what it needs and how to listen to it telling me when I need to slow down. Currently preparing for cycle no 8 and can’t help but feel this may be our last shot, not sure how much more my body can physically take! I also worry more and more about the long term effects of all these high dose hormones.
I remember it so well, I can’t go back to it and try for another, i felt as though I’d lost myself and can’t face that again. As well as all of life losing its shine, I would often feel like I’d been smacked round the back of the head, especially after trigger shots, they then made me a wreck when I needed to be my calmest. Thank you for writing this, so many people think that doing the jabs is the hardest part, but so much sits behind it xx
Thanks for writing. Like you, currently in between IVF cycles, trying desperately to give my little IVF boy a sibling…. Decided to take the summer off , so we can actually go on holiday without me worrying every second, about picking up a bag, playing with my boy or drinking coffee…. So we’re in a little oasis of ‘not trying’ for at least 2-3 months. It’s sad - I’d much rather reach my 40th birthday pregnant, which now wont happen - but there’s a silver lining and a bit of freedom and relief…. Thank you for opening up the conversation in this way, it’s long overdue 🙏