13 Comments
Aug 27, 2022Liked by Emma Barnett

Thank you so much for sharing your story Caroline. It resonates so closely to our experiences, I feel overwhelmed to actually read that others have made the same decision as we did and that living with that decision continues to be bittersweet for us, and for others, particularly my parents who continue to grieve about lost grandchildren and that we won’t experience the same joy that they do from their children. Deep down I am content with our decision, it was and is right for us. That doesn’t mean I don’t catch my breath or shed a tear because of it but also we embrace our life because of it. Thank you.

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Aug 27, 2022Liked by Emma Barnett

Thank you for such a beautifully written article that resonates so deeply. This will be so helpful to so many ❤️

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Caroline, thank you for writing about your experiences. We 'gave up' trying to have children ten years ago after eight years of IVF and miscarriages. It has taken many years for us to come to terms with the life we have and to love it for what it is, and we do, but it has not been easy. I have often looked for a voice - someone who tells this story and very rarely found it, so thank you. It is a story not often told. You have written with honesty and this is so helpful - to me, and I'm sure, many others. I wish you so much luck Caroline, and to all of the other women and couples not able to have children. Rebecca x

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What an amazing article from an incredible lady, that I am sure will be words of comfort to so many people. I read this in your voice, Caroline! You are an inspiration and are so loved!

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Caroline, I had the privilege of meeting you at Rutland Water Parkrun a while back. It was a meeting of no more than 15 mins, but you're ripples definitely reached out to me, so much so, that for no particular reason I thought of you today, looked you up, and found this very moving article. I had no idea of course that at the time of our meeting, you and your husband were most likely at the peak of enduring your personal difficulties. I'm sorry now that I came along with little more than trivia to share with you whilst you must have had so much more on your mind.

We did share a common like of sayings, phrases & slogans. I directed you to Simon Sinek, and I can see now through your amazing business, how clever you are with meaningful words.

I'd like to send you all my love, and a virtual biscuit if I may-The text reads:

"There is a difference between giving up, and knowing when you've had enough" Thank you for a memorable but all too brief encounter. Rupert.

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What a beautifully written article, so insightful and hopeful. I’m sure this will be really helpful to many. A must read, regardless of where you are in the fertility/infertility journey.

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What a beautiful & honest account of your experience of the pain & grief of infertility that doesn’t (or won’t) get talked about. I am childless not by choice & although I never did IVF, the pain of making the decisions around my health & happiness were exactly the same. Some days the grief is triggered by various things but I try to find the beauty & luck in what I do have as opposed to what I don’t. Thank you.

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Thank you for sharing your story, Caroline.

I think it is important for women to be, and be/feel able to be, honest with other women. We should support each other and lift one another up when another is struggling. There should be no judgements, just understanding and support. I think that the more we understand one another, the more we understand what women go through, especially when their experience is different to ours, the more we are able to do this. I am learning so much through this and I admire your (and Emma's) honesty.

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I feel so emotional reading this. The article is beautifully written. I have met Caroline on a few occasions, she is an inspiration.

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Lovely Caroline I’m so proud to call you a friend. Thank you for sharing your story so honestly; although I’ve heard you tell it, it felt raw and painful. And yet you chose to find joy. You’re my inspiration xx 💜

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Thanks for this post very interesting.

Wondering if anyone can give me advice ,

Has anyone had any problems in work regarding fertility.Work is getting stressful I work in a nursery I work long hours etc and recently mangers etc have noticed I'm not my self something happened with a parent this week and when I was spoken to my deputy asked if personal things effecting me when it's not. Work is getting to much not personal things. She also said if treatment does not work for me again why not adop instead and alsob said perhaps cut down my hours or look for another job. Anyone bee in a similar situation?

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Hi Liz, I have been in a similar situation. I worked as an early years teacher during my first IVF cycle. It’s a long story. A lot of work places are not set up to support people going through fertility treatment. In my case my new headteacher used it against me. In the end I decided to leave and do supply work instead. This was the right decision for me. You need to think carefully what is best for you and maybe seek advice from your union if you are in one.

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Thank you for Ur reply. Everyone I have spoken to on groups have been saying the same thing. When I've spoken to family they have been thinking of me getting paid while I have a baby, whenever that will happen. I know I need to think about myself for once , perhaps I will cut down my hours and days and see if that helps me in anyway. All o know it's time to think of me for a chance No1 else sometimes it may help us have a baby if my work load gets better who knows.

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